Archive for November, 2009

Beauty!

Hibiscus

I recently got a new camera for my trip to San Antonio with Cookieboi!  I’ll be posting more pictures but this was from my first shooting adventure here in Long Beach.  I love this place! One of the things that struck me when I first visited was how gloriously beautiful the flowers are and they are everywhere.

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Skydiving!

I haven’t been posting much in months, but last weekend’s adventure is blogworthy and time is not entirely against me today!

This last Saturday I got to do something amazing, truly amazing.  I went skydiving.  Oh wait, let me be clear, I went with my friends, but I was NOT about to pay money to jump out of a plane.  Just not my style LOL but yes, it was still AMAZING.

A new friend had shared with me that she was going on her first jump and one thing led to another.  My friend C has been threatening me for a while with making me jump with her on a major birthday.  I beat her to the punch by (along with another of her friends) giving her a birthday present she’ll not soon forget: skydiving!

So I got to go for emotional support and in case I needed to catch anyone.
Being the motherperson I am I was super anxious but entirely committed to this experience. And I had warned them about the lectures that were to come if they so much as stubbed a toe!

Few things humble me more or bless me more than having someone share their dreams with me.  To see my dear friend make a dream come true in such a dramatic fashion, and see the big ass smile on her face still moves me.  I was part of it.  As I waited on the ground for mah peeps to float down safely to me I had to ponder a lot of things (especially to avoid thinking about gravity).  I was thinking about my position as observer.  I was talking to someone recently about how I don’t do team sports because I’m not especially good at them (okay I suck at everything except volleyball) and I am not competitive and I hate being the one to make the team lose, I hate the spotlight and the feeling of not belonging.  I was explaining how I am a fantastic cheerleader though!  I love to watch, to encourage, to heckle, to support.  But sometimes I overrely on my role as supporter and forget that I can take risks myself as well.  So I’m revisiting the ways in which I participate in my own life. I am looking to live every day more and more.  And that’s a mouthful coming from me because it’s not like I’m a wallflower now!  But I hold back.  And I don’t want to hold back anymore.  My adventure may not be jumping out of a plane but I am called to many other adventures.  And I am going to boldly enter them.  I want my freedom!

My friends were expecting a life-changing spiritual experience and in many ways it was for them.

I was expecting a nerve wracking other-centered experience and in some ways it was but it also ended up being intensely about me.

I am so very blessed.  This time two years ago I was spending time where I wasn’t really welcome and had not yet moved to California.  This time last year I was dating someone I was crazy ambivalent about, I didn’t have solid friendships, and I certainly wasn’t financially stable.  I am in such a great place in my life.  I am so amazingly and abundantly blessed.  I am fabulously single, I am free of many ties that were holding me back, and yet solidly grounded in some great friendships.  I am stable.  I am connected. And, I am looking forward to the holidays on my own terms.

I have been cultivating roots and now I’m ready to test my wingspan.